Monday, February 16, 2009

Clash of the Toddlers (or their moms)

When K was born, a cousin of mine gave birth to a baby girl within a few days of me. We rarely saw this cousin, so the first glimpse I had of her baby was when our girls were 10 months old. Her daughter had just started walking a day or two earlier, and everyone in her family was extremely thrilled and excited. I was happy for her, but I have to admit, part of me was extremely jealous. I tried to "teach" K to walk, but it made no difference. She started walking on her own the week of her first birthday. I quickly discovered that a walking baby is much, much harder to take care of than a nonwalking baby. Therefore, I was not in a big hurry for my next baby to walk.

M was cut from a totally different cloth. He was dying to explore from the day he was born. Not surprisingly, he started walking at 9 months.

It's hard to not get caught up in the baby competition. Who is walking first? Who rolled over first? It can get especially frustrating when you are in an expecting group, because that place is the one place where you can shamelessly brag over your child's accomplishments without peoples' eyes glazing over. However, every baby develops at their own pace, and it can be tough to hear about other kids reciting the alphabet when your child has barely managed "dada". That jealousy, combined with the fact that there are some big liars online can create a unique environment. When S was a baby, a woman in my group claimed her baby was walking at 6 months. I think I actually said BS out loud to my computer, but said nothing online. A couple days later, she posted a video clip. She was telling the truth. You could've knocked me over with a feather!

Z is getting to an age where the leaders are starting to potty train. Z knows the word for potty, and says fart. He has asked to sit on the potty, and I have helped him (though fully clothed). I am sure he is probably a good year away from training, so I'm not even thinking about it, and continue to buy stock in the diaper company.

I hate potty training with a white hot passion. It probably rivals running in my list of things I hate. I probably encouraged my oldest child to train a little before she was truly ready, so it was a long, messy, stinky, drawn out battle. Now, I make real sure they are dying to train, and voila'! It happens in a week or so, with no tears.

Some of the babies on his message board are starting to express interest in the potty. I suspect a couple of them are being nudged along a little. More power to them. I'm too lazy to do that. Maybe it's because he's my last baby. I don't think so though. Diapering is not one of the aspects of babyhood that I cherish (though I do get a little nostalgic for the buttermilk smelling breastfed baby poops that are gone forever). He is my last baby though, and I'm not going to hurry the growing up process; it happens too fast anyway.


ReneeLynn03 said...


Kristen said...

Amen! I love this post becuase I have noticed all of the comparables as well and like you I despise potty training! Ethan will be 3 in two weeks and I haven't even mentioned it to him! So I don't care if he is the oldest kid in diapers at least I won't be getting the crown for the raunchy mom award when it is time!

Mine & Beth's Creations said...


Chardell said...

I'm with you. Noah is already seeming to be interested in the potty and all I can think is "Noooooooo!" All my kids have potty trained very well but I still dread the whole thing.

Kristin said...

Right on. I am all for encouraging new transitions/milestones if they are showing an interest, but I learned my lesson the hard way with potty training a kid who wasn't really ready. It is hard because each kid is so different..even within the same family. I've had easy ones and not so easy ones...and I will wait for Owen's cue on which one of these he will be!

I am with you though..when they're ready, they're ready!